An L.A. scout called from the Food Network last week, and again yesterday—representing the successful show Restaurant Impossible. So, I called back. I was skeptical.
She was legit. She wanted to feature COBBLESTONES on the show. Maybe.
The phone interview—to see if we were worthy of a $10,000 rehab and TV exposure—went something like this:
(and maybe I’m not remembering word for word…)
Food Network: How long have you been in business?
Me: 25 years and 10 years.
Food network: Oh, well that sucks. I mean, congratulations.
Do you work with any family members you can’t stand?
Me: Not any longer. I fired them all.
Food Network: Smart man. So, are you losing money?
Me: Only when I don’t bet on the Patriots, but, actually, no.
Food Network: Hmm. Well, are you making less money than before? Like, is failure imminent or at least possible?
Me: Well, the climate has changed quite a bit, every day is a battle, but, no actually, we’re as strong as ever year to year.
Food Network: Damn. That won’t work. So, what about your marriage? Is it failing? Any chance you’re heading for divorce court anytime soon?
Me: Well, not that I’m aware of. I think that danger has passed. Why, Have you heard anything?
Food Network: No no. Just, if you’re successful, well liked by staff and your wife is sticking around, you’re not really a good candidate for the show. But call me if things start to suck in the future.
Me: Will do. It was great talking to you. Maybe you should call….